Riding, Riding . . . La La La La La La

I used to ride. For fun. For exercise. For a personal challenge. A few years after law school I had a crisis of confidence in the choices I had made up to that point in my life. So I challenged myself to do something that would be - for me - really crazy and out of character and see it through to the end. And I did sort of. I decided to train for the Boston-to-New York AIDS Ride.* Yes, I decided to train to ride my bike (which I didn't have until after I decided to do the ride) over 200 miles (and fund-raise an insane amount of money for someone who hates to ask for favors - I think it was $2500 minimum to participate and that was 10 years ago). All the necessary money was raised. I trained as best as I could considering that along the way (1) my bike was stolen out of my car** and (2) I was in a car accident that put me out of commission for a few critical training weeks. I did the ride as best as I was able despite the fact that there was a huge hurricane that required cancelling the first day of the ride. I wore enormous but cool hot pink feathered wings I made on my helmet. I talked to complete strangers. It was a big deal to me to have done these things. I developed the courage to leave my job and try some new things.*** I am not saying that I ended up happier on the other side but when I have doubts about my abilities to accomplish things, I look back and remind myself that I did (for all intents and purposes) succeed in completing a major personal challenge that not even I thought I could accomplish

* I do not think this event, or the organization that sponsored it, even exists anymore but it was similar to the Avon 3-Day Breast Cancer Walk, except on bikes.

** Funny story - I never ever ever stored my bike in my car overnight but I was plannng to invest in a nice roof rack/bike carrier. I was going to get the rack put on the next day. So I decided to put in the car the night before because I wanted the installer to show me how to put the bike on the car after he installed the rack and I didn't want to get dirty before work jamming the bike in the back of my VW Golf. The rack money was used to buy a new bike - which was never left in the car again.

*** The universe was conspiring against me in part. I took some time off and goofed around at the beach (where I incidentally met my now-husband). When I decided it was time to try getting my act together again, I moved back to New York to look for a job in the city. My return date was September 7, 2001. By the middle of that week, my prospects for work in NY were looking pretty bleak.

Photo credit: k.steudel on Flickr

If The Sun Refused To Shine

Well it isn't refusing to shine today - it is glorious out today. But if the sun did refuse to shine today it wouldn't really matter. I am full of sunshine today. I feel full of light - I am aglow. I am feeling so full of joy right now - my heart feels enormous (flash to images of the Grinch's heart growing three times in size*). It is Friday. I am working close to home. I just got some very good news that I do not feel like sharing.** I treated myself to some yummy yarn that has been haunting me for weeks.*** I found a fun and easy pattern to make something.**** So the long and the short of it is that I feel pretty good today. And I am liking it!

* I really cannot find a video clip of just the heart growing scene from How the Grinch Stole Christmas on youtube.com. I am shocked.

** See earlier posts about on my thoughts about what to share and what to keep to yourself here, here, here, and here.

*** Thanks again for all your help, Allison!

**** For myself! I feel so selfish when I knit for myself but not guilty enough to not do it. This will only be the fourth thing that I will have made for myself in four years!

Photo credit: zoetnet on Flickr

Out of the Clear Blue Sky

The sky looks like this today. Clear. Virtually cloudless. You can see that it is warm but not too humid. Perfect. You want to lie on the beach on a day like this with the breeze blowing off the ocean, tickling your skin and curling up the edges of your towel. It reminds you of being a kid on vacation. There would be a cooler filled with sandwiches - the bread getting soggy because you packed them so early this morning. There would be peaches and plums in that cooler too and their juice would run down your chin with every bite you took. And when you went to lick the juice off your chin you would taste the salt that the air has lifted from the ocean and deposited on you. You would take long walks looking for shells, the cool waves lapping at your feet as you sink into the wet sand with every step. A nap would be in order after that followed by a cold can of soda wrapped in tin foil. Pack everything up and head back to the house after you build a big sand castle and rinse everything off in the water. Wait your turn for a shower - but you don't mind because it feels lovely to sit on the porch and read a few chapters of your book. You know you are going to sleep well tonight.

Photo credit: RichardBarley on Flickr

Reflection

I have stayed up late the past two nights. Like silly late - 2AM and 12:30AM. As detestable as the impact this has on me the next morning (can you say, "zombie" boys and girls?), the deliciousness of being alone to knit and have complete control of the remote is too sweet to pass up.

When I was single I would stay up really late for no reason. I lived by myself so I wasn't avoiding roommates. I think I enjoy being up late for the same reasons I love playing hooky. The day off you have when you ditch out school or work is so much more decadent and luscious than your regular weekend. Being up after midnight on a weeknight is the same - so illicit even if you are just curled up in old sweats watching an Entourage rerun.

Perhaps a night off from nights up tonight. I need to recharge my battery a bit. I'm making good progress on my knitting though . . . . I guess we will see.

Photo credit: A6U571N on Flickr

Green Dreams

I dream (well maybe that is a bit of hyperbole) of being able to garden. We bought our house two and a half years ago - and moved in right before the end of the year so it wasn't exactly gardening time. I was so looking forward to spring - getting out in the garden, moving things around, trimming trees and shrubs, even weeding. Then I found out I was pregnant so no heavy work for me. Then last year, I had this little baby who never napped. When was I supposed to find the time to garden. Okay - maybe this year? Well guess what - knocked up again! I am sure my neighbors hate us. The front yard is a hot mess. There is one tree limb that is so long is touches the ground. We have dead White Pines in the back yard - still with the stakes the tree wench* put in when they were planted over two years ago. The back yard is a mess - poor little boy can hardly go out to play back there. Between the dead stuff, the over grown trees, mulching debris along the perimeter of the yard, sticks, black walnut shells and dog poop we are a mess! Part of the problem is that I work 5 days a week and my husband works 6 days a week and we have no days off together. Another problem is that the Boy still doesn't really nap for long enough stretches to get anything done. Yet another problem is that the Boy is in a very adventurous phase - he needs to be watched at all times so a yard full of hazards is not an ideal place to let him run free. And then there are the mosquitoes who love to eat me up - they come out around 3:30 every afternoon until dark so no after work gardening for me. And the sun - even if the Boy did nap on the weekends for a big chunk of the afternoon the sun in the front of my house is so strong that the door knob on the front door will leave a blister on your palm if you touch it with a bare hand between noon and three in the afternoon. Maybe next year . . . .

*Another story for another day.

Photo credit: CHRISJAZ

According to wikipedia.com:

The term "lemur" is derived from the Latin word lemures, meaning "spirits of the night" or "ghosts". This likely refers to their large, reflective eyes and the wailing cries of some species.

Lemurs are not that interesting, at least not on wikipedia. The most interesting thing that I learned today about lemurs is that they tend to have a female dominated culture which is unusual in mammilian species. The description provided by wikipedia sounds, however, strikingly like most dates and marriages I am familiar with:

where this occurs, adult males exhibit submissive behavior to adult females in social settings, such as feeding, grooming, and sleeping site priority.

Think about it. In most households, who decides what is for dinner? Who spends more time in the bathroom getting ready? And how much of an ass does your man have to be for you to end up on the floor while he sleeps on the couch when you go visit an old friend from high school?

Maybe lemurs seem kind of boring because they are kind of like us.

Photo credit: Robert Zolkos on Flickr

When Words Escape You . . .

Photo title: Oscar Swartz in front of photographic art by Andreas Kock

Seriously, what could I possible add to that? Except that at first glance I thought the photo in the photo was an Afghan hound wearing sunglasses.

That's all I've got. Really.

Photo credit: texplorer

Throw Me To the Lions

So I haven't been here in quite some time. Life has a tendency to sneak in and interrupt the things we actually enjoy doing. Hopefully I will be able to resume my posting on a more regular basis. One of the reasons I stopped writing was that I was starting to feel like all I did was complain and I do not like being that person. One of the reasons for my return today is that Holly has been poking me with a stick for the past few weeks telling me to start writing again. And she "tagged" me with one of those "meme" things.

8x8

8 THINGS I AM LOOKING FORWARD TO

- seeing the Boy later

- seeing my husband

- leaving the office at the end of the day

- spending the weekend with my parents, brother, SIL, etc.

- making it to the beach this summer

- getting rid of this cough/cold/nasty sick thing

- finishing this list

- sleep

8 THINGS I DID YESTERDAY

- knit a baby hat

- went to the playground for over an hour

- ate crabs

- took a long walk

- felt guilty while I listened to the Boy cry and moan all through "nap" time

- dreaded the fact that the next day was Monday

- coughed

- laundry

8 THINGS I WISH I COULD DO

- win the lottery

- get my act together

- walk out of work and never look back

- be better at filling out these lists

- be a stay at home mom

- find time for a pedicure

- live closer to my parents

- be better at making friends

8 SHOWS I WATCH

- Project Runway

- America's Next Top Model

- CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

- Myth Busters

- The Fashion Show

- Big Love

- Entourage

- Weeds

8 FAVORITE FOODS

- good bread

- pasta

- sushi

- potato chips

- pizza

- a good burger

- fruit

- cheese

8 PLACES I HAVE TRAVELLED

- Maine

- Cabo San Lucas

- Israel

- Italy

- Germany

- Massachusetts

- St. John, USVI

- Puerto Rico

8 PLACES I WOULD LIKE TO TRAVEL

- Greece

- Arizona

- Grand Canyon

- Virgin Gorda

- Canada

- Russia

- Japan

- Thailand

8 PEOPLE I TAG

- if you are reading this, consider yourself tagged

Photo credit: flyone on Flickr